Last month we explored the idea of putting ourselves out there…being all in.
This month we take a bit of a pause on our journey to explore what excess baggage we carry around with us that impedes our progress forward.
By definition impedimenta means:
equipment for an activity or expedition, esp. when considered as bulky or an encumbrance
In our case we’re on a journey to self-enlightment, to being our full potential while in this lifetime. Are we bringing along tools that impede us?
- limiting beliefs
Or are we bringing along tools that help us?
- spirit of adventure
- belief in ourselves
I’ve been participating in a weight loss program for about 18 months now. I dropped almost 30 lbs rather quickly. However, for the last 6 months I’ve fluctuated between being 4-7 pounds from my goal. It dawned on me about a month ago that I’ve been sabotaging my progress. While knowing this has been helpful, I continue to consciously sabotage.
At our last meeting we were asked to make a list of why we started this program in the first place…mainly as a way to keep us motivated with moving forward. For me, however, I’ve already achieved everything on the list:
- feel good
- look better
- more active
- fit into clothes I haven’t been able to fit into for years
- buy cute clothes in easy-to-find sizes
As the meeting progressed, I realized that while I do feel good without the excess 30lbs, because I have yet to achieve my goal weight, I fail to feel good about myself despite achieving everything on my list. How can I feel good about myself when I still have 4-7 lbs to go?
With this newfound awareness, I noticed how I always seem to fall short of my goals in some way. I grew up believing that it’s wrong to feel good about myself…that it’s bragging or boastful. So I created this paradox for myself: I want to feel good about my accomplishments; but since I’m not allowed to feel good about what I achieve then I need to create situations where I “fail” in some way so I can’t feel good about myself. In short, why accomplish anything when I’m not even allowed to feel good about it.
Now that I understand this, I can re-invent one of my encumbrances by adopting my new mantra:
I allow myself to feel good about my accomplishments
So before we continue along our journey, this month’s mandala asks us to
- Take a closer look at our fears, our limiting beliefs, and self doubts
- Explore their source and how they impede our progress
- Convert these impedimenta into tools that allow us to excel on our journey
Ponder this as you color the December 2013 Mandala of the Month.
The Mandala lady
Be sure to download Section 12 of the 2013 Mandala of the Year.